Optimist, scientist, lover of heavy metal and life, from beautiful New Zealand. This blog documents my journey to achieving my goals, how I stay motivated when the grind gets hard, and any other useful tips I come across. Life is short, make every second count!
Another big day working from sun-up til sun-down! Although thankfully not as late as the night before…
It’s something I’ve just always had the capacity to do, work long hours. As long as I have confidence in what I’m happy to keep chipping away at what I’m doing until it’s done. It’s where I don’t have confidence in what I’m doing that it all falls apart and my anxiety kicks in… It’s useful, but only in combination with having something productive to do!
I feel like a lot of people struggle with this confidence and and anxiety issue… competence breeds confidence, and the best way to be competent is to keep doing what you’re doing until you’re good at it, or you’ve achieved what you set out to do!
Anxiety has welcomed me back to the party it seems. It is time to slash and re-adjust what I am doing. Anxiety is my “canary in the coal mine”, it let’s me know when deep down I don’t think I am on the best path to what I want, or perhaps what I want has changed, but my actions have not changed to reflect this.
Time to get honest and make some changes that truly make me happy down to my soul, and then tackle it at full steam!
As you can see by the title, I accidentally skipped a day’s blog (not very consistent!). I had a draft ready to go, and was going to quickly finish and publish in the half hour between my day job and night job but in all honesty, I sat down when I got there and got completely distracted, and had forgotten all about it by the time I got home… which is something else I need to work on… checking off my to-do list before I go to bed to make sure I haven’t missed anything, before it’s a new day and a new list!
This week I received some news about changes coming up to one of my jobs that added a little extra anxiety. However,I also know change is the only thing that is constant, and regardless of what happens, I will figure it out. New problems are new opportunities right?!
Yesterday, my feelings of being anxious and overwhelmed kicked up a notch. I knew that it was a pointless waste of energy, and I needed to get my head back in the game, but it was like I was like I was doing everything in a sea of molasses.
By the time I got to my singing lesson yesterday night I felt like I was moving towards a panic attack, but pushed through the lesson, and went straight to bed when I got home.
It wasn’t that I was doing more than I usually do (because other than the gratitude journal it was pretty much business as usual), but I couldn’t shake the feeling that although I had been working hard to hit my goals daily, that it wasn’t enough.
Am I putting extra pressure on myself because of the challenge? or is it something else? Either way, I will figure it out!
If you follow my youtube channel, then you may already know that yesterday was a “head down and push through it” kind of day.
It probably didn’t help that I had a little bit of a late night, was pretty tired when I woke up, but got up and pushed through anyway. I’m glad I did, because by the time I got home from work, I was still tired, overwhelmed by everything that I’ve set out to do, and letting myself think about the things that no matter how hard I had already worked, had not yet achieved.
In other words, I was in the motivational danger zone.
So because I had already done my to-do list in the morning and throughout the day when I had a few ounces of motivation, I got home and just sat back, got some perspective from those I look up to, and had an early night. The evenings are my chill time / time to spend with my partner, so I’m still on track with the challenge.
Nothing that is worth having comes easy. On to another day.